Ewan ko kung bakit ko na lang gusto magpinta. May gusto akong ilikhang imahe na hindi ko maisabi sa salita lang. May isang imahe na gusto kong bigyan ng kulay pero hindi ko alam kung paano ito kukulayan dahil hindi pa rin sa akin malinaw kung ano nga ba ang aking maipipinta. (._.)

Puso Niyang Malaya

       *pasensya na po kung ilalabas ko na naman ang aking pagiging cheeseball*

  Masaya siya. Nakita ko siyang nakangiti doon kasabay ang mga makukulay na mga ilaw. Gusto ko sana siyang lapitan, at kausapin sa sandaling iyon. Ngunit kasama niya ang kanyang mga kaibigan, at sila’y nagtatawanan at nag-aasaran. Kaya ngumiti na lamang ako sa aking sarili, pinagmasdan ang kanyang kagandahan sa ilalim ng mapanglaw na gabi ng Disyembre, at hinayaan na lamang siya, hindi dahil ako’y nahihiya kundi dahil nakita ko siyang masaya karamay ang kanyang mga kaibigan.

        Hindi ko ibibilanggo ang kanyang puso. Hindi ko pinipilit na magkagusto siya sa akin. Hindi ko siya sinusubsob sa kalawakan ng aking pagmamahal.  Alam ko hindi niya ko gusto, at ayaw kong angkinin ang may ayaw sa akin. Luwalhati niya’y mararapatin at buong pusong tatanggapin kahit hindi ako kabilang sa ligaya ng kanyang puso.  Ayos lang kahit mga ngiti na lamang ang aming naipaparating sa isa’t isa. Minsan walang pansinan pero tinuturi ko pa rin siyang kaibigan. Minsan kailangan hayaan na lang pero  pinagdarasal ko pa rin na makamit niya ang lubos na kaligayan. Sana’y umibig at ngumiti siya ng mapayapa dahil ang puso niya’y malaya: malaya sa aking lubos na pagsinta.  

Dream about Death

     Sometimes, you think about on how are you gonna die.
     Sometimes, you think if a lot of people are gonna mourn over you.
     I like to visualize what it would look like when I'm dead.
     I want to wear pajamas in my coffin so I will just look like that I'm sleeping.
    When you will embalm me, make sure that my face is smiling.
     I want a teddy bear beside my corpse.
    Yes, I would love to wear bunny slippers, make them blue bunnies.
    And oh, the pillows-- cover them with SpongeBob Squarepants sheets.
    Also include my wallet with my ID: the heaven or hell might ask for it.
    If you don't mind, spray my body with Penshoppe perfume.
    Don't forget: I want my dead body holding a book, a novel would be perfect
    But before you close my coffin, I want teardrops of grief and happiness
    And let them dribble and dry on my body.

 
   

Hanker for sugar

            The only perfect moment that could exist is the one that have been dwelling for years in my head. Such figments and imaginations of mine jauntily play in my mind like a kiddie amused on a dell with all the dahlias, or whatever gorgeous flowers please the eyes.
             I'm ever preoccupied with the fascination on profusion of stars under a midnight breeze of the winter fling wind, and wrapped with another damsel's arms. Plus the simplicity of holding hands while exuberantly chatting about nonsensical things, or other gibberish yet extraordinary topics that we could ponder upon. I ain't so sure if I have ever met the peaches of my life, or probably I had met her, I just don't know it was going to be her. Perhaps, I already saw her one time but accidentally blocked by an 18-wheeler truck. Or she's still making memories with other people.
             Damn, I'm really oversentimental. Sorry for the gush of fanciness I am deluging here. Maybe, I just need a hot milk and a bunch of cookies... oh desires.  

Self-challenge accepted!

         It's been almost 2 weeks since I deactivated my FB account. Well, I can reactivate it any time I want.... Yeah.. probably, I'll use this as a reason why it came up to my mind to start a blog. 

        It's actually a little experiment; carrying on with my life away from Fb, away from a hundred of close and not-so-close friends. A friend of mine told me that I won't survive for the whole semester without Fb because pretty much of our required readings are send through facebook. Fortunately, email exists. So just a little entreaty to a prof will do. By the time that I'll reactivate my account, I'll have to deal with extensive reconnection with my friends. But I guess this is rather an imposed challenged to myself to connect with my peers personally. And besides, one of the perks for staying out of Facebook for a while is an increased productivity to my studious labors. I have to admit that passively scrolling through my newsfeed (which somehow comes involuntarily) consumes a significant amount of my time. But well of course, working on erudite compositions still depends on me if I have to toil for days and nights squinting through my readings. Oh yes I am absolutely tempted to stalking my little daydream crush, and still hoping for a chance of redamancy. Oh well, let's just see the results for staying away for a while from one of the biggest social media. 

        Wish me luck.